


The Cryptcast

by trueprinci



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alien Culture, Gen, cryptid AU, more like a cryptid Enthusiast au theyre not cryptids unfortunately, side klance - Freeform, they're dating if you squint
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-05
Updated: 2017-02-05
Packaged: 2018-09-22 02:39:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,502
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9578828
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/trueprinci/pseuds/trueprinci
Summary: "Hi," Matt says gently into his mic, as if testing it. "I'm Matt-" He nearly says his last name, before glancing at Pidge. They had agreed beforehand that identifying Matt as Pidge's brother would discredit his story, so they decided to just fudge the truth and have Matt on as a random guest."-And I was abducted by aliens."





	

**Author's Note:**

> so yeah. cryptid enthusiast au. i would love to know what you guys think of this so please leave comments!!

Pidge taps the mic in front of them impatiently. "Is this thing on yet?"

From a distance, Coran gives a thumbs up. Pidge sighs, knowing full well that until Allura gives the okay, they aren't yet recording.

"Let's get this started!" Lance echoes Pidge's thoughts. He impatiently makes a beat on the table with his hands. 

Hunk rests his chin in his left hand. Shiro covers his mouth with his hand as he yawns. Keith absentmindedly plays with his hair. Coran and Allura had been setting up their tech for a while, but ran into some technical errors along the way.

Pidge stands up, pushing off the table by their arms. "I'm gonna see what's wrong."

"Me too." Hunk says, getting up as well.

The duo exits their sound booth, leaving behind three very bored students in the booth. Lance reaches across the table and plays with Keith's fingers lightly.

In no time, their tech is up and running. Pidge and Hunk grin triumphantly at their good work, and Allura and Coran are left with confused expressions on their faces. They come back into the booth, expressions smug.

"We can start now." Pidge declares, watching for a thumbs up for Allura.

"Finally." Lance stretches out his arms, and everyone else jolts to attention, coming out of their sleepy, bored states.

Allura gives the thumbs up, and their intro music plays, a little, simple tune with an eerie air. Pidge created it themself many months ago, with a music program they quickly got the hang of.

"Hello everyone," Shiro begins, waving his hands as if the viewers can see him. "Welcome to the Cryptcast."

"Hello." Lance leans into the mic obnoxiously, cupping his hands around his mouth. Keith elbows him in the ribs, and Lance manages not to choke on recording.

"You want to introduce yourselves?" Shiro offers. "As always, I'm Takashi Shirogane, or Shiro."

There's a moment of silence as they wait to see who is going to pipe up first.

"I'm Keith Kogane." Keith speaks up, finally.

"I'm Lance Mcclain."

"Hunk here."

"Aaaand I'm Pidge Gunderson. Welcome to the Cryptcast, everyone," They start. "We were supposed to have a guest today, but he's not here yet." Pidge leans their head on their hand and sighs.

"So, we're getting straight into the news." Lance announces, turning to Shiro for confirmation. "Can I _please_ tell the first story? I've been waiting to talk about it all week."

Shiro nods slowly, and Lance whoops.

"Okay, okay, so. As you all know, my favorite cryptid is the Pope Lick Monster,"

The rest of the crew groans, knowing Lance was about to go into tangent about his favorite unidentified creature.

"SO," Lance begins with a heavy glance around the room, grinning into the mic. "The Pope Lick Monster was recently spotted by a Virginia woman last Friday, who claims to have seen the monster on a night walk with her dog." Lance informs the listeners. "Now, as you know, the Pope Lick Monster is a native of Kentucky, but I believe many cryptids are travelers, so I don't see why the Pope Lick couldn't have been spotted in Virginia." he finishes with a cross of his arms. "Any comments from the peanut gallery?"

"Yeah, I got one." Keith sits up from his slack position in his chair. "I call bullshit on this one. I know you love this monster, but that lady's story was really inconsistent." Keith discourses. "She kept changing the height across different reports, so I don't know what to believe." 

"That's true." Shiro agrees.

Lance pouts a little. "I don't know, I trust her. She had her dog with her, and the dog freaked out before they even saw the monster."

"You just trust her because she had a dog?" Keith sputters, incredulous.

Lance blinks. "Well, yeah. Is that so bad?"

"I guess not." Hunk sides with Lance.

"Well, a ton of this stuff is up to interpretation." Pidge tries. "Being in the business of cryptology is sticky. There's a lot of he-said she-said they-said." 

"Yeah," Lance says non-commitally, still on the fence. "But I really believe this one."

"That's just because it's a sighting of your favorite cryptid." Keith points out.

" _No_ ," Lance disagrees. "Besides the height inconsistencies, she was pretty accurate in her story. Plus, I think the Pope Lick slouches, like in the infamous photo of them."

"Maybe." Hunk nods.

Keith rolls his eyes, but shrugs. "Maybe it's real, maybe it's not."

It's hard for Keith and Lance to directly agree with each other, so they come to agreement compromises. Pidge notices this with a snort.

"Anyway," Shiro cuts in. "Onto the next story."

Keith's eyes light up. "Did you guys see that video of the UFOs recently? That super legit cellphone video?"

"Yeah, wasn't it in Arkansas? Or Arizona? One of the A states?" Hunk recognizes.

"Arizona." Keith corrects. 

"Was that the one where everyone was going 'holy shit guys' in the background?" Lance asks. "I've seen that one. It was pretty legit."

"Yeah yeah," Pidge recollects. "Some people were saying it could have been a light show, but I think it was way too vivid to be lights. It was really real."

Shiro chuckles. "I'm glad we all agree on this one. Even though we didn't all agree last week, when we talked about if aliens are cryptids or not."

Lance and Keith shift in their seats, keyed up. Pidge furrows their brow, not wanting to see the two get into it again.

" _Anyway_ ," they interject. "Our next story-"

From outside the booth, Allura and Coran are motioning wildly, and Matt's face appears in the window. Pidge's expression is aglow, as is Shiro's.

"Our guest is here." Hunk announces, and Allura and Coran cut the stream. 

Pidge and Shiro raise from their seats and hug Matt in turn. 

"Sorry I was late," Matt apologizes. "Michigan potholes, you know how it is. They fill the holes and it creates _more_ holes."

He smiles at everyone. "How's my little sib? How are you guys?"

Once Matt is settled with his headphones and spare mic, Allura and Coran set the recording back up. Everyone sits with warm smiles, waiting for Matt to say something.

"Hi," Matt says gently into his mic, as if testing it. "I'm Matt-" He nearly says his last name, before glancing at Pidge. They had agreed beforehand that identifying Matt as Pidge's brother would discredit his story, so they decided to just fudge the truth and have Matt on as a random guest.

"-And I was abducted by aliens."

Allura and Coran play the intro music again, right on cue, giving Matt's words a mystifying tone. 

"Matt, can you tell us about your experience?" Shiro asks formally, as if he and Matt weren't great friends.

Matt laughs nervously at the formality. "It was a pretty typical abduction experience. It kind of felt like a really vivid dream. Sometimes I still think it was a dream, like my dad says it was for him."

"Your dad was also abducted?!" Lance exclaims.

Matt stretches his hands out. "That's what I think. But he doesn't believe it, he's not open to the idea." For cryptid enthusiasts like them, this fact is hard to process.

"There was your clichéd bright white lights, and I had a major loss of time. I get flashes of what happened, but it's like, I can't make out the faces of whatever 'took' me." He hooks his fingers in air quotes and clears his throat. "It's a blur."

"Their faces?" Hunk asks.

"Yeah, their faces." Matt nods. "I have a feeling that whatever took me wasn't human. They just had no trace of humanism."

"Do you have physical evidence of the abduction? Pidge said you had something." Keith directs at Matt.

"Yeah uhh-" Pidge begins, their head swarming, cover nearly blown. "He said he had some marks when he contacted me about his abduction." They quickly save. 

"Yeah," Matt agrees, biting his lip. "I woke up one day with these weird scratches on my stomach, not like stitches, but just scratches." 

"Whoa." Hunk awes.

For the rest of their podcast time, the crew goes back and forth, asking Matt questions about his abduction. Matt answers to the best of his ability, albeit nervous. He weaves a spectacular tale of an alien abduction although his words are rooted in truth.

"Great job, you guys." Shiro congratulates after the podcast is finished, and everyone mills about, putting away their equipment, ready to head home. 

"That was a great cast." Keith agrees. "Matt made it really interesting."

Matt darts his eyes around. "Thanks, haha."

Pidge pats their big brother's shoulder. "You did great, I promise."

"This is awesome, this is gonna get tons of downloads!" Lance cheers.

"I'm proud of our big cryptid family." Hunk says, wrapping his arms around Keith and Lance, causing the rest of the group to form around each other in a big group hug, including Coran and Allura rushing into the booth to join.


End file.
